Never Ever
by ConScience14
Summary: It's the Christmas Ball, a happy and festive time, but Harry doesn't feel like joining in. He's sad and lonely. Can Draco be the one to change that? Songfic to the song Never Ever by All Saints.


**Disclaimer:** Unfortunatly, I don't and never will own any of the Harry Pottercharacters. They are purely the ingenious work of the one and onlyJ.K. Rowling. All I own is the plot, and the inventive but twisted mind which thoughtof this story.

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**Never Ever**

It was Christmas time at Hogwarts. Hundreds of snowflakes were falling fast outside the castle, but Harry Potter wouldn't know. He was sitting comfortably in a large armchair by the fire, watching the crackling flames with an expression of sadness upon his face. He was quite alone; most people had gone home for the holidays, and those who had stayed, including Harry's friends Ron and Hermione, had gone down to dinner. But Harry wasn't hungry. Not after what had happened the night before. He sighed longingly, feeling tears of pain drop from his eyes and slide down his cheeks. And so he just sat there, crying silently, for he knew what had happened was his own fault. But it was necessary. He was tired of being used and thrown around like an old rag doll. He was tired of having no respect from the person he respected most. And he was tired of loving without being loved back.

The portrait door opened, revealing the Gryffindors returning from dinner, chattering excitedly about the Christmas Ball taking place that night. Harry didn't take any notice. He really didn't want to go, but Ron and Hermione had begged him until he promised he would. And as if on cue, they both entered the common room, spotting Harry, and walked over to him with smiles on their faces. But the moment they saw Harry's dishevelled appearance and blood shot eyes, their faces dropped as they realised something was wrong. Hermione reached over and gave him a hug.

"Harry, what's wrong?" she asked with concern in her eyes.

Harry just looked away and said nothing.

"Come on, mate, tell us what's wrong," Ron said resting his hand on Harry's shoulder.

Harry looked up into the faces of the people he trusted the most, and he knew then that he could tell them. He wiped the tears from his face, and simply said, "I left him."

His two friends looked at him pityingly, for they knew who he was talking about.

"It's probably for the best, Harry," Hermione said nervously.

"Yeah, mate, you don't need him." Ron agreed. "He's just a self-centered, egocentric, heartless bastard."

Harry stared at Ron, who was then able to clearly see Harry's hollow, emotionless eyes.

"But I love him," Harry whispered shakily. "Despite all that, and what he did to me, I still love him." He bowed his head. "And that's why it hurts so much."

Hermione and Ron could think of nothing else to say, and just silently watched as Harry got out of the armchair and made his way up towards the boy's dormitories.

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It was half past eight before Harry showed his face again. Everyone else had already left, so it was just Ron and Hermione who were sat in the common room as Harry walked down the stairs, all ready for the Ball. He was wearing a nice dark green coloured dress robe that went particularly well with his eyes, which he had bought weeks ago for this very occasion. Harry smiled slightly as he walked over to his friends, who were also dressed for the Ball. Hermione was wearing a long dark blue ball gown, and had tamed her hair, leaving it sleek and straight, while Ron wore robes that were half way between the colours burgundy and violet. The two of them smiled back at him, and stood up.

"Harry, you look great!" Hermione squealed happily, giving him a huge hug.

"Thanks Hermione," he said. "So do you. I can't believe how amazing you look!"

She blushed. "Well I thought I'd have a change and do my hair, seen as it's our last Christmas Ball here at Hogwarts."

"You really do look beautiful, Hermione," Ron said and gave her a kiss on the cheek. She blushed harder.

"You don't look too bad yourself," she replied, and they circled their arms around each other, kissing madly.

Harry stood there and watched, wishing that he could have what his two friends had. He cleared his throat, and the two lover birds tore apart.

"Don't go all lovey dovey on me," Harry smiled sadly. "You're making me feel incredibly jealous."

Hermione and Ron looked at each other, feeling ashamed.

"Sorry Harry," Ron said. "We forgot…"

Harry held up his hand. "Forget it," he said firmly.

"Come on then, let's go!" Hermione exclaimed, trying to lighten the mood. "We don't want to be late!"

The trio made their way down to the Great Hall, and upon entry, gave a small gasp. Whoever had decorated the Hall had done a fantastic job. There was a large Christmas tree full of decorations that was at least 10 foot tall, where the teacher's table usually stood, and the ceiling was enchanted to show the falling snow in the night's sky. The house tables were gone, to be replaced by lots of small eight-seater ones scattered around the room, but leaving a large space in the centre of the Hall for what was undoubtedly the dance floor. A table full of food and drinks was stood at the far side next to the tree, and people were already queuing for a taste. Although it seemed as though everyone was already present, there still wasn't a vast amount of people, seen as most had gone home for the holidays. Harry was glad of this; he knew he'd be asked to dance by many of the girls, so the fewer, the better.

The golden trio each picked up a bottle of butterbeer (courtesy of Dumbledore, much to everyone's surprise), and sat down with their Gryffindor friends Ginny, Neville, Dean and Seamus. The group chattered and joked loudly over the music, which kept changing from Muggle to Wizard bands, but after a while, a slow song came on, and the group paired off onto the dancefloor, leaving Harry alone at the table looking miserable. He sighed, and walked over to the drink table, pouring himself a glass of alcohol-free wine (this was courtesy of McGonergall, which no one was particularly surprised about). Harry was about to take a drink, when there was a cough behind him. Turning around, he saw that it was Luna Lovegood, wearing a dress robe that was a rather shocking pink. Harry blinked at her behind his glasses. "Hi Luna," He said uncertainly.

"Hello Harry," she replied. "I couldn't help but notice you stood here all by yourself, so I thought I'd come over and ask you to dance."

He put his cup down on the table and gave her a smile. "Sure," he said.

She linked her arm around his, and lead him to the dancefloor. Another slow song had come on, so Luna put her arms around his shoulders, as Harry rested his hands on her hips. They swayed together to the music, neither of them feeling anything special between them, but enjoying each other's company all the same. When the song was over, Luna thanked him for the dance, and went over to one of her Ravenclaw friends who was eying her jealously. Harry inwardly laughed, and returned to his seat, where the rest of his friends were chatting about the upcoming NEWTS.

"What do you mean you haven't started studying for your NEWTS yet, Ronald?" Hermione was saying with disbelief. "I started over a month ago! Maybe I should start writing you a study timetable…" The others were laughing at Ron's horrorstricken face, but Harry tuned them all out. He didn't feel like talking much anymore. He searched the crowd for a certain somebody, and finally saw him talking irritably to the DJ, gesturing wildly with his hands. Harry's brows furrowed. _Wonder what that's all about?_ He thought curiously. Little did he know that he was about to find out.

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Draco Malfoy was irritated. No, he was more than that. He was downright angry.

"What do you _mean_ I'm not allowed to do that?" he snapped.

"Please, Malfoy, we're not allowed to take requests." The DJ said tiredly.

Draco rubbed his forehead. "Look, I'm getting rather annoyed now. Just play the bloody song!" he demanded, through gritted teeth.

"Sorry, Malfoy. No can do."

Draco banged his hands on the DJ's decks. "Look here, I want to tell someone how I feel, and he won't listen to me otherwise. I just need you to play this one song, and if it doen't work, I'll leave you alone."

The DJ looked at him sceptically.

"Please," Draco begged. "Please. I really need this."

The DJ sighed. It wasn't often that a Malfoy begged. Or even said please for that matter. So he gave in.

"Ok, Malfoy. I'll play the song. But I only have the backing track."

Draco looked at him quizzically. "So?"

"So…" the DJ faltered. "So that means you're gonna have to sing it."

"Me? Sing it?" Draco panicked. "But I can't _sing_ it!"

"Sorry. It's either that, or nothing." The DJ said.

Draco hesitated before giving a slight nod. "Ok," he swallowed. "I'll sing it."

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Harry had started joining into the group conversation, when the music started. The lights dimmed, and a figure stepped into the centre of the dancefloor, as it cleared of its remaining occupants. The figure's head was bowed, and only raised slightly as it began to sing.

A few questions that I need to know  
How you could ever hurt me so  
I need to know what I've done wrong  
And how long it's been going on  
Was it that I never paid enough attention?  
Or did I not give enough affection?  
Not only will your answers keep me sane  
But I'll know never to make the same mistake again

Everyone had stopped talking, and so the Hall had become completely silent. The figure looked up, it's face shadowed by the darkness. The voice was that of a man's, but it was soft, as if pouring his emotion into the words he was saying.

You can tell me to my face  
Or even on the phone  
You can write it in a letter  
Either way I have to know  
Did I never treat you right?  
Did I always start the fight?  
Either way I'm going out of my mind  
All the answers to my questions I have to find

The figure lifted his head further, while stepping completely out of the shadows, and was revealed. Draco Malfoy was wearing an expensice looking scarlet and gold dress robe, and had his blonde hair ungelled, which now fell down swiftly over his face. He walked forward a few steps until he was halfway between Harry's table and the centre of the dance floor. The music was playing softly, but not altogether quiet, just enough to hear Draco's voice.

My head's spinning  
Boy, I'm in a daze  
I feel isolated  
Don't wanna communicate  
I'll take a shower  
I will scour  
I will roam  
Find peace of mind  
The happy mind  
I once owned, yeah

Draco gave looked through the crowd, until his eyes rested on Harry's. They stayed there, and Draco gave a sad smile as he watched Harry's shocked face.

Flexing vocabulary runs right through me  
The alphabet runs right from A to Zee  
Conversations, hesitations in my mind  
You got my conscience asking questions that I can't find  
I'm not crazy  
I'm sure I ain't done nothin' wrong, no  
I'm just waiting  
Cos I heard that this feeling won't last that long

His eyes never left Harry's, which had started forming tears. Harry swallowed, and stared at Draco's gorgeous face as he poured out his emotion through song.

_Never ever have I ever felt so low  
When you gonna take me out of this black hole?  
Never ever have I ever felt so sad  
The way I'm feeling, yeah, you got me feeling really bad  
Never ever have I had to find  
I've had to dig a way to find my own piece of mind  
I've never ever had my conscience to fight  
The way I'm feeling, yeah, it just don't feel right _

Draco, despite his cool composure on the outside, was sick with fear on the inside. He didn't know how Harry was going to react to this. But he had to do it. He had to tell Harry, and this was the only way he could get him to listen to what he had to say. Harry needed to know what Draco was too scared to tell him last night.

_Never ever have I ever felt so low  
When you gonna take me out of this black hole?  
Never ever have I ever felt so sad  
The way I'm feeling, yeah, you got me feeling really bad  
Never ever have I had to find  
I've had to dig a way to find my own piece of mind  
I've never ever had my conscience to fight  
The way I'm feeling, yeah, it just don't feel right_

As Draco stared into Harry's eyes, all the occupants of the Hall were looking from Draco to Harry with perplexity. Apart from Ron and Hermione. They knew what was happening. And apart from Ron's inward accounts of denial, they both knew deep down that Harry and Draco would make up. And Hermione was willing to let that happen. Because she could see the obvious sincerity in Draco's eyes, behind his cold and heartless exterior that everyone else saw.

_I'll keep searching  
Deep within my soul  
For all the answers  
Don't wanna hurt no more  
I need peace  
Got to feel at ease  
Need to be free from pain  
Go insane  
My heart aches, yeah _

Harry was close to crying now. He could feel the tears threatening to be released from the corners of his eyes. He knew that Draco meant every single word he was saying. He knew Draco was sorry. But was that enough? Was Harry willing to forgive and forget, even after everything Draco had put him through?

_Sometimes vocabulary runs through my head  
The alphabet runs right from A to Zed  
Conversations, hesitations in my mind  
You got my concience asking questions that I can't find  
I'm not crazy  
I'm sure I ain't done nothing wrong  
Now I'm just waiting  
Cos I heard that this feeling won't last that long_

Draco took a few more steps forward, until he was right infront of Harry, still never moving his eyes. Harry was looking at him sadly, but also with a hint of understanding, and was that…forgiveness? Had Draco struck gold? Was Harry willing to give him another chance? Draco didn't know, but he kept singing. He sang with all his heart.

_Never ever have I ever felt so low  
When you gonna take me out of this black hole?  
Never ever have I ever felt so sad  
The way I'm feeling, yeah, you got me feeling really bad  
Never ever have I had to find  
I've had to dig a way to find my own piece of mind  
I've never ever had my conscience to fight  
The way I'm feeling, yeah, it just don't feel right_

_Never ever have I ever felt so low  
When you gonna take me out of this black hole?  
Never ever have I ever felt so sad  
The way I'm feeling, yeah, you got me feeling really bad  
Never ever have I had to find  
I've had to dig a way to find my own piece of mind  
I've never ever had my conscience to fight  
The way I'm feeling, yeah, it just don't feel right_

Harry was crying now. Ron and Hermione went to confort him, but he wouldn't take his eyes off Draco's. They left him and stayed still in their places, watching, as was everyone else in the Hall. Even the teachers chaperoning the Ball stood still and were watching with interest.

_Never ever have I ever felt so low  
When you gonna take me out of this black hole?  
Never ever have I ever felt so sad  
The way I'm feeling, yeah, you got me feeling really bad  
Never ever have I had to find  
I've had to dig a way to find my own piece of mind  
I've never ever had my conscience to fight  
The way I'm feeling, yeah, it just don't feel right_

Draco couldn't help it. He shed a tear. It trickled down his cheek, down his neck, but he didn't care. He kept singing. Nothing else mattered apart from this one song. It was the chance he had to apologise to Harry.

_Never ever have I ever felt so low  
When you gonna take me out of this black hole?  
Never ever have I ever felt so sad  
The way I'm feeling, yeah, you got me feeling really bad  
Never ever have I had to find  
I've had to dig a way to find my own piece of mind  
I've never ever had my conscience to fight  
The way I'm feeling, yeah, it just don't feel right_

_You can tell me to my face  
You can tell me on the phone  
Ooh, you can write it in a letter, babe  
Cos I really need to know_

The song was fading out. It got quieter and quieter, and Draco sang the last few words with the best of his ability.

_You can write it in a letter, babe  
You can write it in a letter, babe_

The music had completely stopped, and there was utter silence in the Hall. No one dared to move, or even breathe. They wanted to know what would happen next. They weren't disappointed.

"I'm really sorry, Harry," Draco whispered, and got down on his knees. "I hope you can forgive me."

Harry had stopped crying, but his eyes were a little puffy and he had tears down his cheeks. Harry swallowed.

"I know I hurt you, Draco," he sniffed. "But you have to know it was for the best. I couldn't cope anymore."

Draco bowed his head. "I know, Harry. I'm sorry for the way I treated you," he said. "But I only did it because it was the only way I knew how to show my feelings. I was scared, and I didn't know what else to do."

Harry didn't say anything to that. He didn't know what to believe anymore.

Draco saw the doubt in Harry's eyes, and at that, he knew what to say. Something he had wanted to say for a long time, but hadn't the courage to do so. He grasped Harry's hands in his and took a deep breath.

"Harry, I know that I may not have shown it before, but I worship you, I adore you, and most of all," he said. "I love you."

There was a gasp in the great Hall as people whispered about what they had just heard. Could it be true? Could Draco Malfoy really love Harry Potter? Of all the people in the Great Hall at that minute, Harry was the one who was most surprised to hear those words. Draco had never shown much affection for him when they were together. And Harry had said those words hundreds of times, but Draco had never once said them back. He had never uttered those three simple words in his life. Until now. And Harry couldn't have been happier. A big smile spread across his face and he dived off his seat and into Draco's arms. They wrapped their arms around each other, and looked closely into each other's eyes, which both showed the unconditional love they felt at that moment. They leaned in closer until their faces were only inches apart. They were both breathing erratically, their breath ghosting over each other's lips. Harry looked even deeper into Draco's eyes.

"I love you, too," he mumbled, and then their lips met in a soft and gentle kiss, one like no other they had ever experienced. Unlike their usual hungry, needy kisses, this one was loving and expressed everything they felt about each other. Their lips moved over each other's slowly and tenderly, until Harry bit down gently on Draco's lower lip, who gave a small gasp, giving Harry the chance to sneak his tongue into Draco's mouth. Their tongues playfully battled for dominance, neither of them particularly winning, and they stayed like that, for what seemed like hours. Eventually, the music had started playing again, and everyone who was watching Harry and Draco lost interest and went up to dance.

Harry and Draco broke apart as they saw Hermione, Ron and the other seventh year Gryffindors walk onto the dancefloor. They both stood up, and Draco gave Harry a playful smirk.

"Do you want to dance?" he asked, holding out a hand. Hary smiled, and took it.

"I'd love to," he replied, and the two walked over to the centre of the dancefloor. Draco positioned his hands on Harry's waist, and Harry wrapped his arms around Draco's neck, then rested his head on Draco's shoulder. The two swayed slowly to the music, both feeling content to just be in each other's arms. When the song had finished, Draco placed his lips next to Harry's ear and whispered, "Merry Christmas, Harry."

Harry smiled at his love. "Merry Christmas, Draco," he quietly replied. "Merry Christmas, indeed."

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**So? What do you think? I know that it's the wrong time of year to post a Christmas themed story but one night I got the idea and just had to write it before I forgot. And I won't be continuing it,incase anyone was wondering. If you want to read a chaptered story, check out _A Recipe of Mishap,_my longer novel-type story.Oh, and please review this story, I'd really appreciate it. Thanks!**


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